RandomMuch

I come from the good old days of real horror movies.  The last time I remember feeling genuinely scared at a movie was The Ring.  Something about that little girl gave me the creeps.  And that scene with her coming out of the TV almost made me cart my TV out of the house like the final scene from Poltergeist.  Before that, I honestly cannot remember another scary movie unless I go as far back as my childhood.  Maybe it’s because I was a young, impressionable kid, but the idea of Jason at summer camp, Freddy in my nightmares, Pazuzu possessing my body like in the Exorcist, and even Michael Myers walking around on Halloween were really scary to me.  Now a days movies just go for cheap thrills.  Nothing is just plain evil any more.  Horror movies, about half way in, turn in to a Scooby-Doo episode.  The killer ends up being some tormented soul that just needed a shoulder to cry on.  Granted, many of the sequels for Halloween and Friday the 13th were just excuses to show boobs, blood, and guts, but they were honest in their approach.  Nine out of ten sequels are just cashing in on the originals’ success.  The movies now show trailers promising a good scare and then deliver simple gimmicks like startling you and the showing off of special effects in death scenes.  Like I tell my lovely wife, sometimes too often, I want a movie to scare me, not startle me.  I hate when they jump out and play that really loud music.  My wife jumping out of her skin scares me more than that.  So when I saw Rob Zombie’s Halloween a couple years ago, I was actually pleased.  I wasn’t scared like when I was a kid, but it wasn’t all gimmicks.  It was a good movie.  And when I heard about the sequel, I was really excited.  I figured, he impressed some people and they said, “Go get ‘em Rob.  Scare the $#!& out of them.”  Did it?  Let’s find out.

The good: One thing I have really liked over the past few years, albeit used a little too often, is the imagery, I believe, started in Marilyn Manson’s videos from AntiChrist Superstar.  This movie used that and I also got that feeling I got watching The Cell(which I love) with Jennifer Lopez.  I also liked how there wasn’t much to explain about what’s gone on since the last one.  This isn’t a “ten years later” sequel.  Things are still fresh within the story line.  And sadly those two almost insignificant details are all that I liked.

The bad:  Where to begin?  I actually made notes on my iPhone during the movie JUST so I wouldn’t forget anything.  The previews made it seem as though we were going to  get some kind of insight as to why Michael was the way he was or some kind of twist to the original story was going to set this one apart from the original.  All it turned out to be was something WE, the audience, already knew but one of the characters didn’t and Dr Loomis reveals in his book.  Which brings me to another thing I really disliked.  Dr Loomis becomes this prima donna  rock star demanding special drinks before making an appearance.  Not to mention having little hissy fits here and there.  It was tacky.  Another thing that bothered me was Michael’s new persona.  One of the things that made him scary to me in the first one is how as he got older, he lost more and more emotion.  He almost literally becomes a killing machine.  Very calm, and cool when he killed.  In this one all of a sudden he’s putting force and emotion in to his kills.  You hear him grunting like if he’s really angry.  But Michael didn’t kill out of anger.  Think of the first movie: The step dad was a jerk to him, as was the sister.  The sister’s boyfriend, wrong place, wrong time.  The nurse was mean to him.  The guards and janitor were obstacles in his escape.  The trucker had clothes that would fit.  Even the couple in his house were intruding in his sanctuary.  Some may have been a stretch, but this movie had at least 5 or 6 deaths that were completely random.

I had high hopes when I heard he was making this movie.  But it seems to me that they came to him for the first one and said, “OK, Mr Zombie, we’re giving you the chance to give us your vision.  BUT… we want this to be mainstream.  Not a cult movie.  So do what you do, but a little more marketable.”  Then once they saw that it worked, they said, “OK, Robby baby, we loved the first one.  The core audience is there and WILL come back for more.  We want you to make the sequel and this time just do what you do.  You’ve earned it.  Just do us a favor and make it bloodier, gorier… you know, follow the rules that Randy talks about in Scream 2.”  And as a result, Robby baby gave us what seems more like a sequel to House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil’s Rejects.  Which are two movies I really liked, but that’s not what I paid to see.  In closing, I’ll say this: I have NEVER walked out on a movie, and my wife and I were about to walk out… twice.  But I made it a point to tough it out.  I kind of wish I had left.

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AC